Summer holiday!

:)

the power of TV/film on the young

the other night my family had dinner at the hawker centre at East Coast Park and a rat ran across the floor a table away from us. seated at the next table were a large group of young children with their family. upon seeing the rat they all screamed.

then one little girl yelled, "REMY!"

the importance of strong family ties

is especially evident during the Great Singapore Sale. because shopping with your family means that you have the spectrum of credit cards between you to garner additional discounts on top of the slashed prices.

down memory lane

i started off this weekend by reading Kafka.

now, little children, reading Kafka the first thing after waking up on a Saturday morning is not the wisest choice to make. really.

so to counter the impending depression, i dug into my book cupboard and took out some of my favourite books from a bygone era.

Sweet Valley Twins.

:)

oh, and to top it off, i watched about 6 episodes of Gilmore Girls last night.

shutdown weekends

call me anti-social but most of the time on weekends, all i want to do is just spend time at home with the family. which involves watching loads of TV, driving with my family in tow, having long chats with my mom (maybe sneaking a bit of "errand-running" a.k.a. "shopping with a purpose" from time to time), eating at home... recently though, i've been trying to make good on a resolution i made earlier in the year - to read more. i had this feeling some time ago that work was making me stupid. in an existentialist way. yes i've been reading but the sort you do for work doesn't give you the buzz. you know, that wonderful feeling of stimulation when you read a book and pause to ponder something beyond P&L (though in my job, i thankfully don't have to think of P&L).

the past two weekend have thus been spent devouring books (1 reasonably thick one last weekend and 2 in the past two days) that i picked up at the MPH warehouse sale on Labour Day. bought at the bargain price of $7 each, they've each been a joy to read, and while some are not exactly academic material, they really did give me that thrill.


Book Review

to appeal to the nerd/intellectual in you, i would heartily recommend this collection of short stories by Chinese writer Li Yiyun. the book is a collection of very touching stories, of Chinese people trying to cope in a post-Mao China/Chinese society. while my mom stopped at the first story as she found it too depressing, it really is a rewarding book if you can get past the rather sad storylines/premises.

What Would Barbra Do, on the other hand, is utterly funny. perhaps the reason why i really enjoyed it was because i adore musicals. Emma Brockes has loads of funny anecdotes from her interaction with musical-lovers and musical -haters, and even has a chapter attempting to explain why men hate musicals (and suggestion of musicals that might change their minds!).
what sold me to buy the book was the synopsis:

Film musicals: you either love them or they make you want to kill yourself slowly with plastic cutlery. Nothing has the power to lift your heart or turn your stomach like Howard Keel in fake sideburns singing "Bless Your Beautiful Hide" or Julie Andrews singing...well, just about anything. There are few situations where the question: What would Barbra do? doesn't have relevance in a world which is much better lived to a soundtrack of show-tunes. This is a book for people who know that: people don't tend to die in musicals, but those who do deserve it; true love waits long enough for an element of mistaken identity to be introduced (especially if one of the couple is a Nazi); and, women carry the show. Talented women wind up alone...But they have the consolation of the torch song, which in Hollywood musicals is more fulfilling than a husband.



Now the last book on my review is in a word, FABULOUS. if every woman in the world read this book, ahhh, life would just be DIVINE. we'd be having lovely formal dinners, people will actually write thank you cards for gifts received, we'd all be CIVIL to each other... oh what a world it would be. :)

Blimey!

now i bet you didn't know there is a COCKNEY BIBLE! it's hilarious!

and i'm sure somewhere up in Heaven, God is chuckling as he reads it...

Excerpts:
Jesus feeds five thousand geezers
(Matthew 14; 13 - 21, Luke 9; 10 - 17, John 6; 1 - 14)
JESUS' chinas met up with 'im. Jesus and his little group of apostles didn't even have time for a bite to eat. So 'e said to 'em, "Oi, fellas, let's pop off on our Jack for a while and have a little rest and a feather."
So they got into a nanny and headed off to a quiet place.
Loads of people saw them leaving, so people from all over different towns ran like the clappers by land and arrived at the same place Jesus was headed for.
When Jesus got out of the old nanny, 'e saw this bloomin' huge crowd.
Now time was getting on and a little alligator, his disciples came up to him and said, "It's getting a little late, boss, and this is a really lonely place.
"I think we should send all these Hank Marvin people to some of the farms and villages dahn the old frog so that they can buy some nosh to eat."
"Why don't you give 'em something to eat?" Jesus asked. "Now 'ang on, boss," they said. "Are we gonna have to spend two hundred silver coins on Uncle Fred in order to feed this lot?"
Jesus asked, "How much grub have you got? Go an' 'ave a butcher's." They told 'im, "We've got five loaves of Uncle Fred and two Lillian Gish."
Jesus then told his disciples to ask all the people to get into groups and sit dahn on the grass.
Jesus then took the Uncle Fred and the Lillian Gish. He broke the Uncle Fred into bits, gave it all to his disciples and told them to give some food to everyone. He also broke the Lillian Gish into bits and told his chinas to pass it on.
Now, would you Adam and Eve it, everyone 'ad enough to eat!

The Lord's Prayer
(Luke 11; 2 - 4)
HELLO, Dad, up there in good ol' Heaven,
Your name is well great and holy, and we respect you, Guv.
We hope we can all 'ave a butcher's at Heaven and be there as soon as possible: and we want to make you happy, Guv, and do what you want 'ere on earth, just like what you do in Heaven.
Guv, please give us some Uncle Fred, and enough grub and stuff to keep us going today, and we hope you'll forgive us when we cock things up, just like we're supposed to forgive them who annoy us and do dodgy stuff to us.
There's a lot of dodgy people around, Guv; please don't let us get tempted to do bad things. Help keep us away from all the nasty, evil stuff, and keep that dodgy Satan away from us, 'cos you're much stronger than 'im.
Your the Boss, God, and will be for ever, innit? Cheers, Amen.



P.S. The translation was done by school teacher Mike Coles and is approved by Dr George Carey, the former Archbishop of Canterbury who feels that it puts energy and passion back into the stories.

my two cents worth

my theory is that Boris beat Ken not because he is the better politician but because Top Gear has ruined Ken's image with its constant repetition that Ken is an idiot for all his policies on road pricing.

TV celebrities 1: Politicians 0

another reason why the media plays an important role in checking the government.

i wonder when that will be true here.

the world would be a better place if

Monty Python-esque diplomacy was employed and Monty Python songs/skits/movies/TV were vehicles of some globally agreed-upon propaganda.

you wouldn't have all these uncivilised and frankly, rather over-the-top, reactions by the Chinese, and everyone will get along splendidly.


The world today seems absolutely crackers,
With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high.
There's fools and idiots sitting on the trigger.
It's depressing and it's senseless, and that's why...
I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're always friendly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
There's nine hundred million of them in the world today.
You'd better learn to like them; that's what I say.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They come from a long way overseas,
But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please.

I like Chinese food.
The waiters never are rude.
Think of the many things they've done to impress.
There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching, and Chess.

So I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese thought,
The wisdom that Confucious taught.
If Darwin is anything to shout about,
The Chinese will survive us all without any doubt.

So, I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees,
Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please.

All together.

[verse in Chinese]
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Wo ai zhongguo ren. (I like Chinese.)
Ni hao ma; ni hao ma; ni hao ma; zaijien! (How are you; how are you; how are you; goodbye!)

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
Their food is guaranteed to please,
A fourteen, a seven, a nine, and lychees.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
I like their tiny little trees,
Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin, and yang-ese.

I like Chinese.
I like Chinese.
They only come up to your knees...


Now, some people have asked me how I can find such a song so hilarious when they are pretty much making fun of my race. My response is, even if they are mocking the Chinese, how can "wo ai zhongguo ren" sung by a group of ang mohs not guarantee a smile on your face?

and if I were one of the millions in China outraged by recent apparently insulting actions of the West, "wo ai zhongguo ren" would sound pretty appeasing to me... there pretty much isn't any way of misinterpreting that statement, if you ask me...

i have a suspicion the Lees have read Kafka

I picked up an old copy of Franz Kafka's short stories recently. The first story was 'The Great Wall of China' and this paragraph really stood out:

Nowadays one can perhaps speak about it without danger. At that time for many people, even the best, there was a secret principle: Try with all your powers to understand the orders of the leadership, but only up to a certain limit—then stop thinking about them. A very reasonable principle, which incidentally found an even wider interpretation in a later often repeated comparison: Stop further thinking about it, not because it could harm you—it is not at all certain that it will harm you. In this matter one cannot speak in general about harming or not harming. What will happen to you is like a river in spring. It rises, grows stronger, eats away powerfully at the land along its shores, and still maintains its own course down into the sea and is more welcome as a fitter partner for the sea. Reflect upon the orders of the leadership as far as that. But then the river overflows its banks, loses its form and shape, slows down its forward movement, tries, contrary to its destiny, to form small seas inland, damages the fields, and yet cannot maintain its expansion long, but runs back within its banks, in fact, even dries up miserably in the hot time of year which follows. Do not reflect on the orders of the leadership to that extent.


And the recent security debacle in Singapore and the debates in Parliament seem to confirm this...

don't you sometimes wonder why/how the oddest, most random pieces of information are retained at the back of your head?

like how your toilet paper should face out because it tears more easily than if the roll faces inwards.

(from the first episode of vintage Singapore sitcom 'Three Rooms' - anyone remember that?)

mmm... custard...

as my mom had a box of Marks & Spencer all butter tartlet cases sitting around in the kitchen for some time, i decided to bake this weekend and use them up before they ended up like the christmas pudding of 2006 (or maybe it was 2005?).

i was surfing Epicurious.com for a tart recipe (something that is foolproof) and chanced upon this, which had very positive ratings and reviews. as i only had 8 tartlet cases and the recipe made 24, i quartered the ingredient amounts and made 6.

To make Portugese Cream Tart (filling):

Whisk together 1/4 cup of granulated sugar and 1/2 tablespoon of all-purpose flour in a heavy saucepan.

Whisk in 150ml of heavy cream (I used Dulla Pure Cream), 2 large egg yolks, some lemon zest, a pinch of salt and 2-3 drops of vanilla extract. Cook over moderate heat and stir constantly. The custard will thicken. Take it off the heat once the first bubble appears on the surface (which will take about 10mins).

Transfer the custard to a bowl to cool, whisking until just warm. Spoon the custard into the cases and bake in a preheated oven (at 200 degrees Celsius) for about 10mins until the crust has browned.

Remove from the oven and allow it to cool slightly. Sieve some icing sugar and ground cinnamon over and serve either warm or at room temperature.


the custard smell filled the kitchen as i was enthusiastically whisking it over the stove and it tasted really delicious. the generous dusting of cinnamon also helped balance the sweetness and sharpness (thanks to the lemon zest) of the custard. initially when i found the recipe i thought it was for Portugese Egg Tarts but upon taking my first bite, i realised it was far from it. but it turned out to be a good thing as this custard can be used as a base for many different tarts (e.g. fruit tarts where you layer pieces of fruit over the custard) so i'll definitely be filling this for future use.

HIS faith has made me whole

because the victory is already mine

I see all my sins nailed to that shattered form
Now grace as healing flows
To me You gave

For you

i'll be your perky cheerleader...

i feel like i'm playing Monopoly and i landed on 'Community Chest'/'Chance'

on the way home from a rather pricey dinner (sigh - it was yum though so COMPLETELY justified...) and had to withdraw cash from the ATM. was rather dismayed at the balance displayed on the screen after the money was spat out and while walking home, was calculating where all my money disappears to each month.

bemoaning the "loss" of my monthly paycheck, i arrived home and realised i had mail. from the insurance company. gosh, i thought, maybe it's about them asking for payment (i.e. my direct-debit/GIRO failed to go through again this month).

to my pleasant surprise, the rather fat letter read:

Dear Policyholder

We refer to our letter dated 28 February 2008.

We wish to clarify that there was no need for you to submit a fresh GIRO form. You may wish to know that we have already forwarded the GIRO form submitted previously to your banker for approval. We shall be writing to you again upon receipt of the bank's approval to confirm the deduction date of your premium.

As a gesture of regret, we have enclosed a S$20/- TANGS shopping voucher.

We apologise for the confusion caused and thank you for your kind understanding on this matter.


whoa! God has a great sense of humour. AMAZING. especially since on the way home doubts were running in my mind about His provision for my finances.

and you know what's the kicker in this? He sent me a shopping voucher! indeed God, You are all-knowing and such a cool friend... :)

IT HAS ARRIVED!

just came today in the post. :)

hey, even the President can be a tad bit cool...

(click on image to view full clipping)

someone once asked me, "why learn Tap dancing? you can't really USE it compared to other social dance forms like salsa..."

well, this just proves you can Tap anywhere, anytime, just because... :)

the most disgusting way to eat fast food

is to have it with salad.

after all, the point of fast food is to revel in the greasiness and lack of nutrition. basically stuff that leads to obesity.

dare i say 'yum'? :)

but to counter the atrocity i committed (and to make peace with all outraged hard-core junk food fans), i tucked into my delicious chicken while in bed, with my eyes glued to the TV (actually, my laptop but who's keeping track here, eh?) watching Gilmore Girls (season 2, if you are interested).

ahh, life is beautiful...

in RETRO-spect

these past days i've been doing something very old-fashioned: instead of taking my Zen Stone Plus to work, i've been carrying my Sony CD-Walkman - YES I KNOW! which also means i've been digging into my CD collection for CDs to listen to.

and somehow that has resulted in me listening to some very retro material. take for example Monday's CD of choice:erm, Geri Halliwell's "It's Raining Men", anyone?oh then Wednesday's was MTV's Fantastic Females! does anyone remember Jennifer Paige?!? and my CD came with a bonus VCD of 5 of the music videos. Celine Dion's "Immortality" with the Bee Gees has got to be one of the best/funniest videos!

Thursday's retro CD-of-choice was...that soundtrack is like doubly retro! a 90s movie set in the 80s and me listening to the songs in the 00s! haha..."Oooh heaven is a place on earth"... "turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so da-da-da-da-da-daaaa"... "karma-karma-karma-karma-karma- chameleon!"... hehehe...
oh and Friday's CD was Robbie Williams - "Rock DJ" is a GREAT song! i can still remember the music video (the one that caused quite a stir) which had him stripping - and peeling off his skin and muscle till he was just a skeleton dancing on stage (with afro-sporting models on rollerskates). ahh... those were the days... when i was a massive fan of his music...

this whole retro-music thing put me in a nostalgic mood at work - and something someone said in the office suddenly reminded me of childhood cartoons and... Stoppit and Tidyup! i got so excited i went around asking my colleagues if they remembered it. and no one did. me being me, i searched for it on youtube and found it!

i remember being very tickled by this cartoon. and The Big Bad 'I Said No'. i loved the quirkiness of this cartoon. which if you watch it when you are older, reminds you very much of Monty Python (very Flying Circus).


and who can forget Zoo Cup! sadly i was unable to find any episodes in English, but hey, football transcends language barriers, right?

I PASSED MY DRIVING TEST!

YAY! *does the dance of joy, Perfect Strangers-style*

i accumulated 14 demerit points during the test, 12 of which were while IN the circuit - Failure to confirm safety during 1) directional change [-4], 2) vertical parking [-4] and 3) parallel parking [-4].

on the other hand, while on the road, i positioned my car incorrectly at the junction (did not move far enough into the yellow box for the right turn) and failed to overtake when necessary (in my defence, there was a really expensive-looking Merc in front of me in the filter lane who decided he didn't want to turn right after all so he moved out but part of his car was still in my lane and i didn't think i had enough clearance space to overtake him without scratching his car OR inching into the lane of oncoming traffic). Thankfully these mistakes were "free" (as my instructor said, "you get to make mistakes like this for FREE" - cue excited expression in voice). the mistake that i did make which cost me 2 points was "failure to use appropriate gear". which in this case, not changing up to 4th gear. even though the fastest i went was probably only 50km/h. apparently the tester said that once i hit 40km/h i should have used 4th already. :(

BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER! BECAUSE I PASSED!

and am excitedly awaiting the arrival of my photo-card in the post in 2 4* weeks!

*due to some system upgrade...